Duke Nukem Forever Demo Review

Duke Nukem Forever is a bad game. At least that’s what critics are saying, and they’re wrong. It’s not a bad game in the traditional sense. It’s like getting a hot dog when you ordered a steak. It tastes okay but it’s nowhere near as good as what you wanted. Duke Nukem Forever is just a mediocre game. Yet it still manages to live up to the franchise, which is what makes it so depressing to play.

I think views on the original Duke 3D are through nostalgia tinted glasses. It was an evolutionary step in shooters, but didn’t add that much to the Doom formula. Pimple faced gamers of the mid-90s loved it more for sex references and its trademark crass humour. In many ways, Duke was the Family Guy of video games. Derivative yet edgy. Forever has all the same stuff people loved about the original game. Those adolescent gamers have since grown up into adults spoiled by a plethora of M-rated games. Despite keeping its original formula, Forever is not as shocking as the original because adult games have become the norm.

The game starts off in a bathroom. Of course it does. Your very first task is to use a urinal. Watch the golden pee stream into the bowel. How delightful! You can also pick up a turd and throw it around the room. Yes, you read that correctly. Naturally, I tried to put it in the urinal. Like Duke 3D, there’s a ton of random environmental stuff like this to play with.

After a brief interlude that involved me drawing a penis on a whiteboard, you get into some action. Duke is in a football stadium with a bunch of guys battling a giant alien. After a short jaunt through the basement, you get the Devastator rocket launchers and battle the monstrosity. There’s no thought too it. Just strafe and gun. It’s a very primitive shooter tactic. Once the boss is down, Duke pulls out its eye and kicks a field goal with it.

The next demo level is driving the Duke 4×4. The driving controls on the PC are just horrible. Half the time you’ll get stuck up a wall. The rest of the level involves getting gas for the truck. This gets us back into more traditional shooting. The shotgun, RPG, shrink ray, and rail gun all make a return. The shrink ray is difficult to use as Duke won’t automatically stop enemies. The other weapons are more standard fare. One thing that annoys me is the ability to only carry two guns at a time. It’s an aspect of modern shooters that doesn’t fit this style of game at all. Duke was all about the weapons, so why can’t I carry more? More often then not, you’ll get stuck with a gun you realize wasn’t the best choice.

After finding gas and getting out of a mine shaft on a cart, the demo ends.

I left with the impression that Duke Nukem Forever is just a mediocre shooter. Not terrible but certainly nothing special. The game truly is a relic of the 90s. It just feels dated. The graphics and gameplay are similar to games made six years ago. The PC version offers no visual enhancements over the console counterparts other than higher resolutions. Not exactly the best port, considering it was originally being developed for the PC platform.

If you’re a fan of the series, definitely give this game a rent. Only buy it when it inevitably ends up in Steam’s bargain bin. After 15 years in development, it could have been a lot better. However, as long as you don’t take Duke too seriously, he’s still enjoyable.

Score: 6 out of 10

What Works:
-Classic Duke style returns
-Sound effects are okay
-Epic boss fights

What Doesn’t Work
-Humour is not shocking or funny, just childish
-Dated graphics and gameplay
-Overly simplistic and linear
-Only able to carry two weapons at a time
-Driving missions leave a lot to be desired